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[underniman]

ᴛᴇxᴛs | ᴘʀᴏᴍᴘᴛs | sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇʀs | ᴇᴛᴄ

Comments

[undersecan]

that camera, yeah. the one camera we have. the camera.

the file names and numbers don't line up so i've come to the obvious conclusion that you had to delete stuff.

[underniman]

wow, could you try making that sound even creepier? "and what did you do with the children's heads after you were done with your demon summoning and deleting stuff, jackie?"

you can unclench, apple blossom, maren just asked me to film a reading she did. i guess she's demoing at yet another conference next month.

[undersecan]

see, with that text as evidence, i think i can justify that your mind wanders to some weird places when left unattended and bored. and what tends to follow? shit. just the general shit.

but maren gets a free pass.
buy her something nice for her trip, i could have turned you in for tampering.

[underniman]

your choices are unbore me or call a cop i guess.

poor you ;;

[undersecan]

i'm sure there's a cop around here that could use something to do.
i'm gonna have to put you on hold, hang on.

[ ... yes he's aware this is text and not a call, just go with it. ]

[underniman]

oh okay i'll just pretend i'm listening to hold music

you lunatic

[undersecan]

[ five full minutes later... ]

the cops must actually be busy today but i got the secretary, had a nice chat
sorry, were you saying something about unboring you?

[underniman]

mmm. you tell me.

[ danger, will robinson. how does jackie make his voice suddenly an octave lower in text?? witch powers, probably. ]

[undersecan]

[ stop that, jackie, it's not remotely fair. ]

you know it's not remotely fair when you do that.

[underniman]

ohhhhhhhh

should i stop?

[ B) ]

[undersecan]

you should stop making that smug face i know you're making, yeah.
fuck your mmm's

1/2

[underniman]

anything for you, sugar.

[underniman]

on just one teeny lil condition.

[ go on, ask what it is :D ]

1/2

[undersecan]

[ sugar. ]

can i backtrack and ask for another mmm instead

[undersecan]

[ okay, no, he was sort of kidding. ]

what teeny lil condition?

[underniman]

a) no, that time is past


honeysuckle :3

b) tell me, and mean it from the very bottom of your heart, that whatever smug face i’m making right now

[ it’s the i’m pinning u to a wall with my eyes rn face ftr ]

isn’t turning you on, even the very littlest bit. not even a smidgen.

[undersecan]

[ honeysuckle. is there no end to this?

don't answer that, he already knows. ]

...
why are you trying to make a liar out of me?

[underniman]

well golly be, petunia petal

[ no. there is no end to this. at least not one in sight. ]

you could always tell the truth, wouldn't hurt you none.

[undersecan]

i don't know, i think it might hurt a little.

[underniman]

wimp

1/2

[undersecan]

your smug face turns me on. more than a smidgen.

[undersecan]

but also fuck you

1/2

[underniman]

[smugface.jpg]

[underniman]

😙

[undersecan]

kissy faces aren't winning you any points right now.